Nature is terrifying.

On dreams, and dolphins.

A dolphin, likely trying to get in bed with you, as they are wont to do.

So here’s an embarrassing thing I’ve never admitted publicly before: I once had a relationship with a dolphin. Now, in full disclosure, it was in a dream, but it’s still troubling none-the-less and certainly not something I’m proud of. What’s … Read More

Poop, viruses, etc: stories from the front line of my toilet

AIDS virus particle

With more and more stories out about viruses and bacterium (poop’s overachieving cousins, who for reasons unclear to me, are more socially acceptable to talk about) I’d like to do my part to fan the larger feces family’s flames, so to speak, as part of a multi-pronged effort to spread the fascination with poop. And what better way to do that than through a series of vignettes…on viruses, bacteria, and feces: … Read More

Bowerbirds — A moderated stream of conscious post.


Spirit animals–I’m not sure if this is actually a real thing…or one of those fake things that your friend who invented it insists is real while making you feel insignificant for not knowing what it was already. But, without doing any sort of research on the subject, let me posit it as a real thing: “you know, a spirit animal? Like what animal your spirit is.” … Read More

Nature is Terrifying: Humboldt Squid

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Whether it’s giant sink holes unexpectedly deep-throating an entire city block or rogue waves attacking cruise ships, it’s become increasingly clear to me that nature is terrifying (or at least the media’s presentation of it). Every night I make it … Read More

The Stories You Might Have Missed This Summer

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Lindsay Lohan went to jail. And got out like 25 seconds later. BP splooged all over the Gulf of Mexico. Obama continued to weave his master plan of infecting this country with socialism/communism/fascism/dictator-ism. And the World Cup happened. Yes, yes, … Read More

Where’s the Largest Battle Ever Waged?

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Where’s the largest war being waged in the world right now? The answer might surprise you. It’s actually being fought by 4 colonies of nearly a trillion Argentine ants across the state of California, where millions of ants are slaughtering each other each day. They are officially the coolest things ever. … Read More

Beau Biden’s Safe. And, exhale…


Last week, Beau Biden was taken the hospital. No one seemed to care. But I did. Luckily, Beau was released yesterday with a healthy prognosis from his doctor. And, all together now: exhale… In celebration of his safe recovery, it seems only fitting that we revisit probably the best example of campaign propaganda I’ve ever seen. … Read More